Learned Helplessness

I used to think of the “church” all the time. I dreamed of it - the building and the people. I find myself thinking of them less and less. But, they come up in my reactions. In the way I view the world and the people of the world.

I have no doubt and no hesitation in calling what went on when I was there -- and what continues to happen -- brainwashing. I know you will all deny it. You have been programmed to deny it. But, whether you are able to acknowledge it or not, it is the truth.

Is the brainwashing intentional? At this point, I don’t believe there are nefarious motives. Just tradition. And fear. The way things have been done for generations. All you know. In fact, I believe the brainwashing varies from household to household. But, it’s clearly still going on.

As the folks my age (40s) are now becoming grandparents, what is passed on in the form of religious beliefs is more and more hearsay and ingrained acceptance of the word of man than the actual words of God.

It is debilitating to be under the control of a crowd - an organization - who are ruled by a strange and unreliable game of generational gossip.

Last spring, I was interviewed about the death of another FOC baby. I said I felt sorry for the family. It’s true. That baby didn’t have a chance and neither did the baby’s parents. They were young (the baby’s grandparents are younger than me!) and they were under the control of an organization they never chose for themselves. Now, they have lost custody of their other baby and are facing criminal charges and prison time.

It is not a sin to get medical care for your babies. It really isn’t a sin. You should pray and use the resources God has provided - including medical professionals. Putting your faith in God is good, but not researching your professed faith for yourself is just helplessness. And helplessness can cost you dearly.

The Ghosts of Dead Men’s Beliefs

You may be surprised to discover that I was not raised in a religious community. Not really. I was raised under a shadow of religion. Like our religion was a persistent and very bossy ghost. I was told what “I” believed, but never asked. I did not experience God personally. I heard some things about other people who had experienced God. But mostly I just experienced judgement and condemnation and also participated in these judging and condemning rituals.

I wish I had grown up in a community that practiced grace and kindness.

That would’ve been amazing.

But, if things had been all soft bunnies, rainbows, and unicorns, I wouldn’t have such an interesting story to tell….

Zero Days Without Sarcasm #newyearsresolution #2017 #sarcasm

I always make New Year's resolutions (and I always break them). Last year my New Year's Resolution was to get into shape. I joined the gym (on a 17-month contract) on New Years Day. And I went to the gym a dozen times in January, four or five times in February, and maybe three more times in all the rest of the months that followed. I have really good reasons/excuses for not going. Really. But, I will be canceling my membership in April.

This year I have a much more serious resolution: to give up sarcasm. Ugh, I can barely type that without rolling my eyes and spewing several sarcastic thoughts! Sarcasm has become an idol to me. I admire sarcasm in others. I think it is a sign of quick wit and superior brilliance. I value humor and intelligence, so it follows that I am irresistibly attracted to sarcasm in all its iterations. But, I must relinquish this dear habit because I have become aware that it is harmful.

As much as I hate quoting the dictionary, I can't bring myself to skip these convicting words:

sarcasm

noun

1. harsh or bitter derision or irony.

2. a sharply ironical taunt; sneering or cutting remark

(dictionary.com)

When I look at the definition of this favorite pastime of mine, there can be no justification to continue. I must give it up.

Like a maniac shooting flaming arrows of death

is one who deceives their neighbor and says, "I was only joking!"

Proverbs 26:18-19

I'm not sure anyone is still reading my blog but if someone does read this entry whom I have ever hurt with my "bitter derision" or "cutting remarks," would you please email me so I can attempt to make amends to you?

And, now that I have shared my 2017 New Year's Resolution, would you please leave a comment sharing what your resolution is?

Thank you and Merry Christmas!

Mormon Roots?

I first learned about the Mormon religion (a.k.a. The Church of Jesus Christ of Ladder Day Saints) in a United States History class in college. I had never heard about Mormons or the Book of Mormon or Joseph Smith before that time. When I heard about this man (Joseph Smith), my immediate reaction was that he was a lunatic or heretic (or both). It was just so incredibly unbelievable.

Over the years I have known several Mormon people. Some of them were very nice, well meaning people. Others were just ... not. I guess you could say that about the people who claim just about any religious affiliation, Followers included.

In 2012, a man from another Followers offshoot (The Church of the Firstborn), named Darren Russell shared a document with me called "ARTICLES OF FAITH OF THE CHURCH OF THE FIRST BORN KNOWN AS THE FOLLOWERS OF CHRIST - 1918". One anonymous commentor pointed out that the Articles of Faith were similar to the LDS Articles of Faith. Another commentor claimed that Walter White (who was the leader of the Oregon City Followers of Christ church until his death in 1969) had a maternal grandmother named Carrie, who was part of the LDS Church.

If the Followers had Mormon roots, they were quite hidden to us! We didn't read (or even know about) the Book of Mormon and the other texts the LDS church uses.

Recently, the Idaho Followers have made the news again and this time the reporter has claimed that the Followers are "fringe Mormons." Interesting. At first I dismissed this as poor reporting. But, maybe there is something to this.

If any Followers (current or former) know anything about this, would you please comment on this post and enlighten me? 

Prayer Changes Everything #prayerchangesthings #faith

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV)

I have recently fallen in love with the practice of prayer. I don’t know why it has taken me so many years to begin to understand the life-changing power of praying.

I have listened to sermons about prayer, read articles, and chapters of books about it. I have recited prayers by rote. I have prayed aloud, with others, and for others. I have often prayed for meals. But it has always been, well just lifeless. I don’t think I ever really believed I was communicating with God.

And I have had some really powerful experiences with prayer – answered prayers. Corporate prayers. But, for the most part, I have just not been a person who prayers every day (or even once a week).

A few weeks ago, my bible study leader encouraged us all to pray. I ignored the encouragement. Just words. The heavens are brass (see Deuteronomy 28:23).

And then I received a text from said leader asking if we’d been praying. I responded that I always forget. And she suggested I pray while driving. So I said I would, and I usually do what I say I will do, so I did.

I prayed all the way to work for my students, my students’ families, my coworkers, everyone who came to mind. And I had a really good day. I felt empathy for my students. I listened to them more closely. I started to like my coworkers more.

On the way home, I prayed for my family, church members, neighbors, and everyone else who came to mind. And the blessings continued. I pay more attention to others. To what they need and want. To their hurts and their feelings.

I continue to pray. It has completely changed my relationships.

Who knew?

Still Struggling with #Pride

I am plagued by doubts about my salvation. I cannot be good enough. I do not deserve salvation. I do not deserve grace.

I know that other people can accept that free gift, but I am convinced that I must earn it or at least be worthy. 

Maybe I am not chosen by God for salvation. 

Or, maybe I was chosen, but I have wandered too far from the straight and narrow.

Is it too late?

I am trying to believe.

I am trying to have faith.

I am trying to repent. 

I am trying to change my thoughts, words, actions, and beliefs.

I am trying to accept God's grace and forgiveness.

I really am trying to figure this out. Maybe I'm trying too hard.

I Am Smart. I Am Strong. I Am Independent. #seekinggod

I just spent an hour at the gym and I came home feeling GREAT! Thirty minutes on the elliptical, 2 sets of 15 reps on all the weight machines. I am walking on air! I can conquer anything! 

Oh, and have I mentioned in the past ten minutes my collection of advanced degrees? How many countries I've visited? My IQ? The number of books I read each week?

If you know me in real life, I probably have.

You can probably tell that I struggle, really struggle, with pride. Satan's sin of choice. That's me: SO important. SO smart. SO independent. 

And, really, to be honest: so lost.

I read the Bible, but it doesn't change who I am. It doesn't make me a better person (how could it when I already think so highly of myself?).

I go to church and Bible study, but it's more for education (or entertainment) than for worship.

And I feel so far from God.

Tonight, two people came to my mind. Two people I think are "weak" and emotionally fragile. Not me. Nope. No way - I have it all figured out. 


But, wait....maybe being weak isn't the worst thing that could happen to me...

It's time to be honest: I have hit a "wall" in my faith - well, I likely have been walking around this wall for years - and I am ready to find my way THROUGH it. 

Prayers would be welcome.

That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 

2 Corinthians 12:10

What Exactly ARE The Things Above?

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

Col. 3:2 (NIV)

I have always imagined that heaven is magical, peaceful, beautiful – if boring – city in the clouds. There are the requisite mansions for everyone, golden streets, and angels floating by on fluffy, white clouds. And in the middle of everything, Jesus is on his beautiful, majestic throne with piles and piles of crowns surrounding the Messiah. Millions of worshipers – with their perfect bodies – sing to the King with their perfectly melodious voices.

So, when I read in Colossians that we are to set our minds on “things above”, I wonder if this is how I should be setting my mind each day. Is this the key to avoiding anger, gossip, lying, and all the other daily temptations? Does it work? How do I live in the here and now while my mind is set on Heaven?

I don’t have the answers, but I do know that what I have been doing is not working. Someone at bible study asked the question: would the way we live change if Jesus were physically present. Yes, of course, we all agree that if we could SEE Jesus at all times we would live a lot differently. So, I am trying something new: a physical reminder of things above, of Heaven.

I’m wearing a necklace called Heaven (from Premier Designs). It has the key to Heaven, a door with a keyhole, a crown of pearls on one side and multiple colored gemstones on the other, one of the charms has a golden cross on one side and a golden road on the other, and the last charm says “Rev. 21: 18-22”. This physical object that I’m wearing is my way of reminding myself often to set my mind.

What do you think Heaven will be like? And, how do you “set your mind”?

These are not rhetorical questions. I really would like to know what others think and do.

Endless Life: Feeling Trapped

Note: I've been on hiatus from blogging for a while, but I am working on a few new entries. Thank you to anyone who might still check this blog :)

*****

At age 20, life can drag on and on. Actually life can drag at any age, when a person feels trapped.

“But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.” – 2 Peter 3:8 (NIV)

When I was seventeen, the decisions of two individuals caused my social life to end within the FOC. Of course I realize that my own decisions, words, and actions over the months and years prior to this time led up to these little shunnings. But although I had said and done some stupid and hurtful things, I hadn’t committed any “unforgivables”. I just wasn’t lucky enough to be born at the right time, or into the right family, or whatever. The fact was I had suddenly become a pariah.

So for three years I lived in a state of essential, though unofficial, shunning. Almost nobody talked to me, except this one guy, J--, who verbally assaulted me every chance he got while everyone mutely watched/listened. For three years I went to the social events and talked to virtually nobody. Toward the end, I talked to a few other similar pariahs, but I never had a chance of social success after those two people decided to destroy me.

Those three years were an eternity. Can you imagine? Three years of attending church services twice weekly, without being greeted or spoken to, or in any way acknowledged. Three years of attending dances and home parties and decorating parties while being invisible. Three years of having no life outside of my family and work.

But other things happened during those three years. I went to work and had a fair amount of success in this aspect of my life. I was trained in every aspect of automotive office management: payroll, accounts payable, receivables, warranties, new and used car titling, and month-end reports. At age twenty, I was promoted to office manager, with a staff of older/more experienced employees reporting to me. Something else happened: guys asked me out all the time. Not FOC guys, of course, but worldly guys. I couldn’t believe that so many attractive, charming, successful men would want to date me after all the social silence I’d endured at the FOC. I didn't want to date the entire world, but it was just one more indication that the "reality" I experience in the FOC didn't check with reality elsewhere.

It came down to the decision to continue living as an invisible and unwanted recluse in my parents’ basement hoping that the years of loneliness would pass quickly and the reward (the possibility of salvation for all that sacrifice) would be real or bolt into unknown territory. Was this seemingly meaningless existence even worth it?

Just Keep Walking: A Lesson on Resisting Temptation

My daughter is a hoarder by nature. Sadly, she has a mother who purges her extra clothing, toys, and other nonessential items when things start getting too cluttered. Despite my best efforts, she has way too much stuff. And this is no thanks to her grandmother who likes to help her sneak stuff in the house. It's a constant battle.

One of this little girl's strongest temptations lies in those little coin-operated junk-made-in-China machines near the exit of stores. She always begs and pleads for some "cents" to put into those dispensers of worthless plastic. 

Tonight, I had to stop at Walmart to pick up a prescription (yes, I take them) and I was feeling awful, but the kids did not get that. They are little people with their own agendas. As I was waiting with my daughter at the pharmacy, she chattered about everything she wanted to look at and I just wanted to go home and crawl into bed. I finally told her that I just wasn't feeling up to walking around the store and she acquiesced to leaving all her unfulfilled shopping desires behind and heading home.

As we neared the front of the store, I saw those colorful, glimmering sentries and I sped up to get through the doors ahead of the kids. And that's when the magic happened. I got through both sets of doors and was standing outside Walmart when I turned and saw both kids standing silently behind me. I was thrilled and shocked.

I looked at my little girl and said, "I am so proud of you for walking out the door without asking for coins! Thank you for doing that."

She said, "I wanted to ask, but I just kept telling myself, 'keep walking. keep walking'."

"I bet you don't want those things now that you can't see them." I said.

It made for a good discussion with both kids. Because temptations will plague us throughout our lives. I have lived long enough to know that what is tempting to some people is not at all tempting to others. I am not tempted to eat pastries, drink soda, or use drugs. But those are very real temptations to millions of others. I am tempted to sin every single day though. Sometimes I keep walking and sometimes I fail. 

But tonight was a good illustration and reminder: just keep walking. The farther away we get from our temptations, the farther we are from them. I'm no expert on addictions, but I'm going to remember this lesson for a long time. Just keep walking. 

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

1 Corinthians 10:13 (NIV)

The most interesting people are imperfect and unafraid to be real #plasticpeople #keepitreal

I recently described someone by saying, "I really look up to her." The responses? "That's pretty incredible because you don't look up to very many people."

The first thing I have to do right away is confess: my low self-esteem has resulted in the building of great, thick walls of false bravado. People who know me superficially  - the way the VAST majority of people do know the folks around them - may say that I am confident (those who like me) or that I'm a snob (everyone else). But the truth is that I'm neither confident nor snobbish. I often avoid social settings because I believe other people are annoyed by me. I don't trust myself to know and apply the rules of social etiquette.

But, I do have other reasons for disliking other people: they're fake (myself included). It's just too much work to make small talk with perfect, plastic, always-cheerful people. I'm sorry, but they're just not interesting.

The people I respect are unafraid to be real.

I don't like perfect people. I don't need someone to tell me all the platitudes and wisdom that pop into their heads unless it's in the CONTEXT of a hard-earned personal narrative.

I want to surround myself with people who have had real, imperfect lives, and have learned from their mistakes - or are in the process of learning/growing. I want to spend time with folks who are willing to be real about the ugliness of humanity and their less-than-stellar moments/days/years. 

Fire Insurance - Get Outta Hell Free Card

In September 2001, I still had what old Christians call a new believer's fire (pardon the pun). I was on fire for Jesus. It's something like the feeling of falling in love - a feeling of euphoria, single-mindedness. And I was newly in love - with Jesus. 

After 26 years of being told I'd go to Hell for this, that, and the other thing (most of which I had absolutely no control over); I had become convinced of the GOOD NEWS of Jesus - see Romans 6:23.

I couldn't believe I hadn't discovered this truth sooner! I wanted to share this love and security with everyone.

I guess I had a reputation at my office (I was then working as a technical writer) as an evangelist, bible thumper, proselytizer. 

So, when September 11th (2001) happened, some people wanted to talk to me about God. And one man, who practiced Hinduism, brought his wife and child to work to meet me and talk about Jesus. I told them about the path to salvation, invited them to church, and gave them a bible.

My coworker, the Hindu, thanked me for the bible and said he would put it in his home with his other holy items. Um, what? I asked him about the other items. And he informed me that he was going to add the bible to his Hindu items. This seemed very wrong to me. Sacrilegious. 

I told him that God is a jealous God and that we are only to worship Him.

Later that week I talked to my pastor about the situation and I was surprised by his advice. He said to lead any willing person to Jesus, and then let Him do the rest.

We can't get right with God before approaching God because we can't get right with God without God's help. 

Think about it.

You may not have another day, week, month, or year. You just never know when your time here is up. So, if I were you, I'd invite Jesus in. Maybe you think I'm wrong to say that avoiding Hell (fire insurance) is a valid motivation for seeking Jesus. But, I disagree. Go to Him under any circumstance. Let God do the rest. 

"Let It Go" Lyrics & Personal Application #Frozen

While I'm not big on television or movies myself, my seven-year-old daughter loves a good movie. Her first movie obsession - beginning about age two - was "The Little Mermaid". I think she watched that movie at least fifty times. She still loves playing with mermaid dolls in the bath. Then, about a year ago, she discovered "Gnomeo and Juliet" - a movie that I hope will spark her appreciation for Shakespeare one day.

The last few days, she's been watching "Frozen" on repeat mode. It's a well-made movie with some really good songs. One that moved me was, "Let It Go," by Idina Menzel. I'm printing the lyrics to this moving song here, along with my reaction below:

"Let It Go"

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight
Not a footprint to be seen
A kingdom of isolation,
And it looks like I’m the queen.

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I tried

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be
Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know
Well, now they know

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door

I don’t care
What they’re going to say
Let the storm rage on,
The cold never bothered me anyway

It’s funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can’t get to me at all

It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me
I’m free

Let it go, let it go
I am one with the wind and sky
Let it go, let it go
You’ll never see me cry

Here I stand
And here I'll stay
Let the storm rage on

My power flurries through the air into the ground
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I’m never going back,
The past is in the past

Let it go, let it go
And I'll rise like the break of dawn
Let it go, let it go
That perfect girl is gone

Here I stand
In the light of day
Let the storm rage on,
The cold never bothered me anyway

This song could easily be a symbol of my last years in the FOC - feeling isolated and stuck. My leaving - "no rules for me - I'm free." And, after many long years of working through the past and overcoming the records playing in my brain, this stanza says it all:

It’s funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can’t get to me at all

A Tiger Doesn't Lose Sleep

Are You a Christian Scientist or a Scientologist?

In the 1990s, I was a young adult, recently out of the FOC; yet, I didn't have a lot of ways of successfully relating to the world or explaining why I had some very odd attitudes, beliefs, and practices. Why hadn't I ever been to see a doctor? Was a Christian Scientist or a Scientologist? Well, neither.

I hadn't - at that time - even heard of such religions. I barely understood the difference between Judaism and Christianity. I learned not to share my differences with most people because it just led to questions I either couldn't answer, or didn't really want to talk about.

I don't really think about those other religions much - except that they share some practices with the FOC such as shunning ex-members and discouraging medical interventions. Christian Science actually has more in common with the Oregon City branch of the FOC than I would've imagined. Not only are they faith healers, who believe in the Bible - they also do not have ministers, but base their religion off the legacy of their leader's words (in the case of Christian Science, the published work of their leader). Like the FOC, many practitioners, children and adults, have died from medically-preventable ailments. Christian Scientists practice faith healing through consultations (in person or over the phone, where the practitioner / provider argues the illness out of the patient / parishioner. It is the only faith healing practice that qualifies for billing through medical insurance.

Scientology, on the other hand, is not based on the Christian religion. It was started by L. Ron Hubbard, a science fiction writer, and was made famous by Tom Cruise. Scientologists believe people are immortal in that the essence of us lives on in nature. I haven't delved too much into researching their beliefs, but from skimming their website, they believe in striving to be the best they can be, spiritual enlightenment, etc. While many may believe that Scientologists practice faith healing; but, according to their website, they do take prescribed medicine and seek medical care with the exception of psychiatric medicine, which they believe to by harmful and sometimes deadly.

While I am no longer a faith healer, I do appreciate the basic belief. I believe in prayer with medicine - that God can heal and God can (and does) use medical doctors and medicine to help us heal. And, while I do not agree with most of the Scientology movement, I do appreciate the idea that psychiatric medicines are overprescribed and often not the best path.

Men First

Imagine the scene. Women and girls have worked hard to prepare their best dishes for the potluck. They’ve arranged these delicious offerings on nice serving trays and together, dozens of women have set out stacks of plates, silverware, napkins, and cups. Multi-gallon pots of coffee are brewed. Everything is set up. Time to eat.

Men and boys rush to line up and pile food onto their plates. They take their heaping plates to a table and wait for their wives to bring them coffee. Other men crowd in with plates of their own.

Where are all those women who have prepared this feast? Where are their daughters, who’ve eagerly helped? They stand back until all men and boys have helped themselves and taken the best seats. Some women bring cups of coffee to the men.

After the men and boys are served, seated, and eating; the ladies begin to line up. The food is getting cold, the favorite dishes are running out, and the seats at the tables are taken. That’s okay, because they’re not expected to sit with their menfolk to eat. A woman sitting down at a men’s table would be scandalous.

I didn’t think it was odd. I certainly didn’t like it, but like so many other rituals which were set up in favor of men and boys, I had no power to change it. It just was.

Now imagine what potlucks and church events are like outside the FOC. Women and men prepare food to share – mostly women, but many men enjoy cooking and happily add their best dishes to the feast. When it is time to eat, and leader calls everyone to attention and prays for the food. Then people line up and fill their plates. People are not segregated by gender, though sometimes by age. Elderly folks are often invited to go first, or children. But I always get my food with my husband – not for him (he likes to serve himself), and certainly not after him. And we sit together. He would hate to be forced to sit at an all men’s table. How boring!

“…but whosoever will be great among you, let him be your minister; and whosoever be chief among you, let him first be your servant”

Matthew 20:26-27

The Power of Words: The Other F-Word

Many people think I’m weird about words. “It’s just a word,” a counselor friend declares – attempting to convince me that it’s fine for children to curse. I don’t agree. Even while teaching adults, I often stopped students in hallways and common areas who were dropping f-bombs to let them know that educated people should have attained the use of a broader vocabulary than f-ing this and f-ing that. It simply makes people sound ignorant, in my opinion.

When it comes to my children, I’m even more vigilant about what they can hear, because what goes in may eventually come out. With my oldest, I managed to prevent him from even hearing the f-word until he was ten. That wasn’t easy to do. It meant heavily restricting his movie-watching, friends, and most-importantly: where he went to school (private Christian school). Then one day, it happened. I left him with a trusted sitter, someone I’d known forever and trusted. She, apparently, thought nothing of saying it in front of my kid. And he came home and proudly repeated it. Theory confirmed (what goes in comes out).

But the real f-word is much more dangerous, in my opinion. The word is “fool.” I remember the first time I heard someone use the word – in seventh grade as we were heading for our after school buses, a worldly kid shouted at another boy, “You’re a fool!” A felt icy cold air around me. I felt certain that boy had just signed himself up for hell.

But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.
- Matthew 5:22

When I was around fifth or sixth grade, some of my peers started using the word “idiot.” When my folks heard us kids using the word, they put a stop to it, pointing out that idiot is synonymous to fool. I later came to realize that most insults are also synonyms of fool. So are there any safe insults to hurl at people? Is this the point of Matthew 5:22? Don’t insult people? Don’t call people names?

Although, I’ve overcome my past enough to realize much of what was taught and widely accepted was not biblically accurate, I’m still terrified of words like fool.

And worse than fool, is the taking of God’s name in vain – which, to my mind, I confuse with blasphemy. Maybe I’m incorrect about that, but I figure it’s better to be safe than sorry. Truthfully I’d prefer to hear the f-word a million times than to hear someone take God’s name in vain.

What do you think about the power of words? Harmless or very potent?

New Beginning

"Let go of yesterday. Let today be a new beginning and be the best that you can, and you'll get to where God wants you to be."

- Joel Osteen 

The Gifts of the Magi

I know many Christian families who use the gifts of the magi as models for giving to their children. To represent myrrh - personal hygiene items (we usually give the kids new toothbrushes in their stockings); for frankincense, an item to further their spiritual walk such as a devotional book; and then the gold gift, which our family represents by wrapping this one in gold paper: the gold gift is an item the kids really want: a video game, bike, doll, etc. How does your family integrate Jesus into this holiday?  

****

Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judaea in the days of Herod the king, behold, there came wise men from the east to Jerusalem,

Saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.

When Herod the king had heard these things, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him.

And when he had gathered all the chief priests and scribes of the people together, he demanded of them where Christ should be born.

And they said unto him, In Bethlehem of Judaea: for thus it is written by the prophet,

And thou Bethlehem, in the land of Juda, art not the least among the princes of Juda: for out of thee shall come a Governor, that shall rule my people Israel.

Then Herod, when he had privily called the wise men, enquired of them diligently what time the star appeared.

And he sent them to Bethlehem, and said, Go and search diligently for the young child; and when ye have found him, bring me word again, that I may come and worship him also.

When they had heard the king, they departed; and, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was.

When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceeding great joy.

And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense and myrrh.

And being warned of God in a dream that they should not return to Herod, they departed into their own country another way.

Matthew 2:1-12

The Birth Story

My children love this story - and know it well. My seven-year-old has been paraphrasing it since she was four, but she still asks us to find it in the Bible and read it to her every Christmas.

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And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.

(And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)

And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.

And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)

To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.

And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.

And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.

And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.

And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,

Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us.

And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.

And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child.

And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.

But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.

And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

Luke 2:1-20 KJV