The Opposite of Love ...

“The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.” – Elie Wiesel

On Wednesday, I published some the words of kindness and encouragement that readers have shown over the past ten months. Below, please read the responses from the folks who do not appreciate my blog …

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its not a lie & if you were in a family that had problems with self righteousness & puffed up in their own conceit didnt you think maybe there day would come? you act as though they stone you to death!! my grandmother left the church as did I, we both went back to church & my grandmother with stood their prosecution..yes I agree within ones own family generally speaking you do get persecuted much more severely! such was the case with my grandmother, but she had unwavering faith in god till the day she died, gods people are a persecuted people. without trials in life how on earth do you make it to heaven? I as well live in a different state, kentucky to be exact & I now wish I hadnt ever left.I was miss judged, treated bad..but then again out of the church you dont have things much easier..Lifes tough no matter where you are in this world & in some instances the things I see many people endure is humbling to say the least & makes my own trials of ones looking down on me pale in on Shunning

Susanne, I don't know where you are getting all your knowledge, because you aren't old enough to know any this first hand! and your parrents are a good source of info because they are not all that bright, I know that! on Signs of the True Believer

Where did you get this info. It seems like it is less than accurate. Kinda like all your stories some truth some false some lies. on The Calling of the Prophets

You were not even born, how can you be so wise? on Walter's Dream

You shouldn't speak for what other people believe. Even though You were raised in the same church doesn't mean you know what I believe. We were not raised "the same". You like to make blanket statements about people you haven't talked to in 20 years. This is my last post, the only reason I ever posted was to find out who Darren was, now I know. I do wish Darren would have been more clear about who he was, If he is interested in Oregon city then get should go there. He won't learn much about them here. Oh I am sorry I forgot If it is online it must be true. on Guest Blogger: Darren Russell

If you think you are causing confusion and doubt in the church just remember,your not but.....who is the author of confusion? your not alone in writing this,for your sake please be careful,for your words you will be judged. on What Did He Die For?

Maybe when your done with the FOC you can go after the Amish on What Did He Die For?

Oh is that like being a born again virgin? Doesn't work that way on On The Mat

Better Get facts straight not stories but facts. on The Rejected Preacher

JUDAS ISCARIOT THOUGHT HE WAS RIGHT ALSO on Seeking A Medical Opinion

Off topic??? that is why you cencored the question??? I just know your type very well. what type you ask? The type of person who blame the foc church members for there short comings. You never fit in when you were a member because of your very loose morals. When people like you leave you claim its for religon but in all reality its because your guilt drove you out. you now try to justify your lifestyle by lashing out at the church. Many examples are out there that prove my point one example you would be quite familiar with is.... I will use some discretion with names, c s left because of the state of the church like many others and shortly after leaving cs cheated on his wife LS formerly LL and then left her after taking her out of the foc church. If I'm not mistaken I belive you are family with CS.... if you disagree with me that's fine but I knew you and people you messed around with in the church and people that read this blog that are from the foc church need very much to on Darren Russell: Why I Choose Not To Use Physicians

Get ready for the attack! Suzanne and Maggie attack like wild dogs when they are challenged. They like to dish it out but they don't take it very well. Shumakers always think they are the smartest person in the room. Take it all in stride, suzanne is hoping to gain fame and fortune by writing a book about her former friends. She will probably delete this comment because its "off topic" on Jerry Patton: Medicine & Faith

Suzi, if you read the bible, women are not to be teachers. Maggie you wear your religion as a publican. Leave these people alone. No one is disecting your life, so stop doing theres. They know in their heart they are right. Let them live their life and meet their maker on their own. It also says in bible they will hate you without a cause. Sounds like all of you... on Jerry Patton: Medicine & Faith

Well I might not spell as good as most but I can read. Wich is more than I can say for you (anon 905 pm). if you dont think that people like suzzane and maggie are taking constant jabs at the foc than you havn't read this whole blog! calling people outside the foc "True Followers" is a direct shot at the foc. And what do you think suzi's point is calling the foc a "sing along" or calling it "playing church". come on you people are all full of bitterness and hate and try to cover it up by puting the chapter and verse of a book of the bible in your comments to try to look smart or something. to me you look like a bunch of self righteous bitter people who love to blame everyone else for the lives you led that pushed you out of the church. on Jerry Patton: Medicine & Faith

Wow!!! You win. You posted the dumbest thing yet. good job moron. on We Are Going to Hell

Good job Zuzi on another massive generalization of a church that you, obviously know alot less about than you realize. I know all you shumakers think you know everthing but you have missef again. Susanne, have you thought that your generalized views on the foc church and there beliefs about the church are possibly off base and that you and the other ex-followers believe these things because thats what was told to them by there own family. You have said many times that there was no preacher when you were there so obviously you were being told all this from your parents. Mabey the reason you and all you ex-follower contacts acctually left is because of what was being taught to them in there house, not what was being taught in other peoples houses. Like I said befor, I know you think you know everything about us because you "poll" other ex members, but your jaded view on us is just that, jaded. How can you what other people believe in thete hearts or ate being told at home. I know that on We Are Going to Hell

Ex-followers are great revisionist's. on C.C. Smith: Divorce

Thanks for the Love!

I sincerely appreciate ALL of the people who read and comment on this blog – particularly the guest bloggers who add more depth and perspective than I could ever hope to do alone. This week, I am away at a writing retreat on the beautiful Star Island off the coast of New Hampshire. In my absence, I want to honor and say thanks to the readers of this blog by reprinting some of my favorite comments.

Your positive comments have given me encouragement to keep going – so a sincere thank you to each and every one of you who has sent me emails off-line, made comments in person, and to the people who write kind and positive comments on this blog.

Of course, the less-loving commenters are also a huge motivation to me. They keep me in line and help to ensure that what I write is accurate. On Sunday I will post some of the negative, accusatory comments, but for today please enjoy a nice, calm stroll down memory lane ….

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I want more!!! on Why I Married a Stranger

I think your story is so fascinating, and I love how you write about it. on Kissers & Worldly People

brings back memories. on Kissers & Worldly People

These are amazing!! Thanks for sharing your story with us. on I am a Kisser

Another 'wow'! I am really enjoying the unfolding of your story, Suzi. on I am a Kisser

THESE ARE AMAZING!!! YOU NEED TO WRITE A BOOK. on I'll Drink the Cool-Aid!

Suzanne - Let me know when the book comes out. Really enjoy your story, especially as I am one of the "outsiders", an OC kid from the start and even today (50 years later). Very interesting reading about a "Follower" from one who was within. Keep up the good work (and thank God you went on to go to college and follow your dream). on I'll Drink the Cool-Aid!

Wow, Suzi. I am so intrigued by your story and would love to hear more. on Dogs & Swine

I graduated from OC High the same year you were born and there were a number of Followers in school then although they didn't mingle at all. I am finding your blog very informative and it is answering many questions I've had about the church. Maybe you can answer this in a future post but I am curious what the church services are like if there is no minister and no new religious teaching going on. on Why People Stay

I think those of us from Oregon City find this information brings us comfort. We all went to school with FOS members and you either seemed scary to us or we could not understand how to be your friend. As a mom I do not believe that anyone would for no reason allow their child to die. You are changing the views of many Suzi and maybe that is your calling from God.

I look forward to reading each and every one of your post. As a person that grew up in Oregon City and was "school" friends with several from the FOC church I have always had many curiosities on "why" people do what they do or "why" they believe what they believe. I remember you from school as you are only a year younger than me. Back then I really don't recall stories of children dying, but I very much remember the story of TC dying at if I recall correctly the ripe age of maybe 28 or so. Young none the less with a beautiful wife and two young boys whom literally had to watch their father die over many agonizing months from something that could have easily been helped. I got angry then. Why would he let himself wither away and die like that? How could he let his children see him suffer and die under their very own eyes, how does anyone justify that? Now with all the news over the past few years of children dying and now having children of my own I find it incredibly on Why People Leave

ok when will we get to read your memoirs? i want a copy. i feel like i might be the only guy that follows your blog. But i have grown up around followers and i love to read about the things we never get to hear about. Ok so now for my questions, do you still know any of the members or were you shunned for leaving? What made the rest of your family leave the church? How do you feel about the couple that has recently been in the news? I remember that they were found guilty, but i dont remember what the charges were. i went to school with them and i have to be honest,and as i dont agree i feel for them. Finally how do you think this will affect the church and the members. onGuest Blogger, Karin, Home Birth

Suzanne, Way to go, girl! I've really appreciated your giving us a glimpse into the world of the Followers of Christ. You're a lovely woman. Thank you. on Control Measures

Keep up the good work Suzanne. Sunlight is a good disinfectant. It would probably surprise many in the FOC to know that your blog has actually made me more sympathetic to those who are trapped there. on Control Measures

Thank you so much for continuing to write your blog and educate so many of us that grew up with the Followers but never truly knew them. You have definitely hit a nerve with some people and I applaud you for speaking out. on Control Measures

Suzi, you put these things into words so well. I admire your depth of knowledge. It has to be questioned why the FOC doesnt get the results that the Bible promises. If they're following it so perfectly, why all the dead people? Older folks I can understand, but you would think that there would be better results with the children. Do they believe it literally, like as in call the elders of the church? on Signs of the True Believer

I always love, love, love reading your blogs. What a fascinating world. Thank you for sharing! on Signs of the True Believer

KEEP WRITING, SUZI, YOUR DOING GREAT. GOD'S BLESSINGS, DEB on Frequently Asked Questions - Part 1

I cant wait to buy your book :) on Frequently Asked Questions - Part 1

I'm so excited that you are doing a book!!!! Good for you! on Frequently Asked Questions - Part 1

I like how you write about your experiences with your former church and the reasonings behind it while defending the choices of those who still remain. Very nice post. :) on Why People Stay

Thank you Suzi for being so honest about the followers. Don't let them get to you, please continue to write.. No one is losing interest, trust me. If anything you have MANY eyes waiting for the next blog. on The Calling of the Prophets

Loved your blog post. So proud of defending yourself against the nay sayers. So easy to say anything anonymously. As we know. on The Calling of the Prophets

I'm impressed by you, Suzi. Keep going. on Control Measures

As one of the anonymous posted above, your blog has also made me much more sympathetic to Followers. I am sad that they are so misinformed. As for your blog, you can hold your head up high, Suzi. You exude integrity. I have noticed that you are very careful to say what you experienced directly and what you have been told. on Control Measures

Suzanne, I am so amazed and impressed by your writing, and by your poise and maturity in the responses to these cowards. With every word you share with us, I hope you know that you are adding to the enlightenment and entertainment of your fans. I have shared your blog with my friends and family, and we all look forward to every post. Thank you for sharing your experiences and talent. on Control Measures

It is sad that they feel the need to insult you and your parents. I, for one, am glad you write these so that we might better understand why things are the way they are. I actually find that I have a kinder view rather then the opposite. on Control Measures

I look up to you for being so honest and doing what your heart told you to do. I have grown up with all the Followers I pray they will learn to rethink the ways they have been taught. I keep thinking of all those little babies who have died and could have been alive today being able to breath the fresh air they never had a chance. on Control Measures

What a great accomplishment this will be for you! My thoughts and prayers are with you on this endeavor! I would love to read it someday! ;) Tanya on W.I.P.

Suzi, just want to encourage to stay strong and continue speaking the truth. on The Calling of the Prophets

Losing interest! If this gets any more interesting they're going to make a prime time tv drama out of it. What in the world is the problem with the comment that this person quoted. I've seen nothing but respect shown to a theology that deserves none. Of course that's just judging from the comments posted here, and the precession of members getting thrown in jail. All of the disrespect and no doubt untrueths leveled here were directed at you and your parents. on The Calling of the Prophets

I for one think you are WONDERFUL AND SPEAK THE TRUTH those who think your not are only those who are trying to cover the truth.. Keep up those great work. For those of us who have lived in Oregon City all our lives no your doing the right thing. Your living your life the way the Lord wanted. You love your family. Those who believe in this Church will keep on doing what they want they have been BRAINED WASHED AND NO NOTHING ELSE. One generation after another keep on getting brained washed. Keep on giving us more information, we love it and we no you do speak the truth not hiding it. on The Calling of the Prophets

Very powerful, Suzi. on Still Coasting

All I can say is WOW, so much going on in my little town. Thank you for sharing and showing us who knew so many of these people the truth. As a child I do remember the Followers sending their kids to school when they had illness that should have kept them at home. I remember kids getting in car accidents someone from the Church would set their bones and they wouldn't be able to walk right again. I remember the kids from this Church were very nice but were not allowed to do anything with non church members.Now I know why. The Church did not want the kids to know the lies they were living. I find it sad to think that so many people have been brain washed in to believing a man like Mr. White . Makes me wonder if he thought he was a super hero of some kind. How can anyone become so much in control of a flock of sheep? What is even more sad is the fact the brain washing has been going on for years and years, each family doing it over and over and over again. They think they on Full of Faith and Scared to Death

It looks like some eyes are FINALLY being opened at FOC . They wouldn’t be attacking the truth that you are writing if they weren’t. Keep up the GOOD work. on Still Coasting

Wow Suzi! That is utterly beautiful! My heart is rejoicing as you share this testimony in what Jesus did to transform you. God is good! onOn The Mat

This blog is causing awareness, it's only confusing to find out that everything you've been told all your life is contrary to the true nature of Religion. It's confusing to become aware that despite your truest, best efforts, you're falling short of your goal of earning salvation, it can't be earned. on Darren Russell: Why I Choose Not To Use Physicians

I thought I knew Suzie pretty well back in the day. She seemed a little off to me, not stupid so much as off. Now I realize it was because she was operating with half her brain tied behind her back. If she had spoke on the subjects that she's talking about now, she would've been treated as a pariah. She was trying to be a good follower, a little too quiet, not someone to say just the right thing all of the time, and when she did, it wasn't always what you wanted to hear. BUT, I can also say That I NEVER knew her to be a bad, or immoral person, and it's a little too transparent that she's all of the sudden a horrible, immoral person? Now that she's shedding light on a subject you'd rather was never brought up. Pitiful! on Darren Russell: Why I Choose Not To Use Physicians

i agree. suzi has always spoke her mind. that does not make her off unless you are in a very conservative group. suzi makes mistakes but she is not immoral. she is a very loving and giving woman. she believes christ is her savior as he is everyones. she has a beautiful soul and would not hurt anyone intentionally. suzi, you are a courageous woman for writing and creating this blog. you set a good example for your daughter and other women to follow. it is good to tell the truth. it is good to speak up when there is wrong. christians have had to do that since jesus was on this earth. on Darren Russell: Why I Choose Not To Use Physicians

Kelly Stone Gamble: Wiley Cash's A Land More Kind Than Home

Kelly Stone Gamble is a freelance writer and personal friend. I asked her to review Wiley Cash's novel, A Land More Kind Than Home, for this forum as the subject of the novel brought back memories of my own childhood.

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I’ve been reading Suzi’s blog from day one and although I don’t agree with a lot of the ideas that the FOC promotes, I do understand, to a certain extent, how those that have been surrounded by and immersed in a religious environment become trapped in a world of belief.   There is one thing, however, that I just can’t understand, or maybe just can’t accept.  That is the suffering that some children are forced to endure because of their parents’ choices. 

I recently read “A Land More Kind Than Home” by Wiley Cash, which is the story of two young boys, Jess and Christopher Hall, both of whom become victims of their mothers belief.  The story is told by three narrators: the church matriarch, the town sheriff and Jess Hall.  Christopher is autistic and during a church service he is killed as the preacher, Carson Chambliss, and other members of the church attempt to ‘cure’ him.  This is an oversimplified description of the book, but it is enough for me to explain what really haunts me about this story.  Even after her oldest son is killed, Julie Hall continues to follow Chambliss, forsaking the welfare of her younger son, Jess.    

Julie was raised to believe, and in this case, to believe in the words of one man who hides behind the cloak of religion.  She is a victim, too, and when her son is killed, the reader is sympathetic.  Julie is unaware that Christopher saw her and Carson Chambliss, the church’s leader, in bed.  But Chambliss does know, and decides it is time to free the demons that are the cause of Christopher’s autism.  Julie allows Chambliss to try to heal her son, and it leads to his death. 

It is not necessarily Julie’s blind following of Carson Chambliss that bothers me.  As I said, I understand how those that are raised in a religious environment can become sheep-like.  However, when one child is killed, isn’t that enough for a mother to say ‘Stop’?  Isn’t that enough to open a woman’s eyes and realize that her children, her gifts from God, are her responsibility and she must do what is best for them, regardless of what her church deems right?  At what point does providing for the safety and welfare of ones children become paramount in the lives of those that follow a religion that clearly puts those lives in danger? 

I realize that ‘A Land More Kind Than Home’ is a work of fiction, however, the incidence of parents allowing the beliefs of their church to interfere with their own responsibility to their children is not fictitious at all.  It happens too frequently and at times results in unnecessary illness and death.  As a mother, this is what I can’t accept.  God blessed us with children and it is our responsibility to care for them.  Because in the end, it is not the Carson Chamblisses of this world who will answer for the abuses of the children.  It is the Julie Halls.  

Wiley Cash, Kelly Stone Gamble, and Suzi Shumaker - June 16, 2012

Darren Russell: Women's Hair

In the past, there were conflicts and disagreements among the different Followers of Christ sects so severe that the churches disassociated with one another. One of the major points of contention was over women's hair. Yes, you read that right. A bunch of old men arguing over whether or not women should cut their hair. That sounded crazy to me, so I asked Darren Russell to explain the issue. Here is his response.

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It is said that a picture is worth a thousand words.

Photos of adherents of Oregon City's Followers of Christ Church have frequent found their way into newspapers and programs. Selling stories is much easier with grabbing photos of mug shots or court proceedings. Both sides of the court system know that juries are often swayed along with the public by first impressions. A defense attorney asks his client to look the part of a normal every day upbeat true blood American and the other side leaks and introduces to the court and press the most vilifying photos. The photos themselves depict whether a person is happy or stressed, normal or peculiar, and we begin our evaluation of that person with these impressions.

I belong to a related church with some differences. And when we see these pictures there is one that leaps out to us. We don't focus on facial expressions or even much on the dress. We see the hair. I know my first reaction at seeing some of the women on trial was, "How do they pray?"

What does hair have to do with prayer? Let me explain.

In a nutshell we are faith healing sects and rely on prayer for our healing, for many of us, it is the only recourse. Any hindrance to our prayer could have serious repercussions. If we have sin in our lives we have to root it out and confess it. We also have to show ourselves to be subject to the orders God established.

In I Corinthians 11 Apostle Paul begins with, "Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ," It is a plea to some brethren then, and to us today to hear him out and keep what he says. He continues, "I praise you for remembering me in everything and for holding to the traditions just as I passed them on to you."

His subject is the significance of the head's covering and how it indicates an order with God. "But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God."  Then comes Paul's statement. "EVERY man who prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonors his head.  But EVERY woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head—it is the same as having her head shaved.  For if a woman does not cover her head, she might as well have her hair cut off; but if it is a disgrace for a woman to have her hair cut off or her head shaved, then she should cover her head.  A man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man.  For man did not come from woman, but woman from man; neither was man created for woman, but woman for man.  It is for this reason that a woman ought to have authority over her own head, because of the angels.  Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman.  For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God." 

He reiterates and presents another argument so as to press his point home, introducing the importance of having a proper relationship with God.  "Judge for yourselves: Is it proper for a woman to pray to God with her head uncovered? Does not the very nature of things teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a disgrace to him,  but that if a woman has long hair, it is her glory? For long hair is given to her as a covering.  If anyone wants to be contentious about this, we have no other practice—nor do the churches of God." NO OTHER PRACTICE...possibly the Followers Church has overlooked this?

I am not exactly sure how the Followers Church escaped this teaching, but have an idea. I do know that this doctrine has been a historical bone of contention among many assemblies, and some have put it aside as if it was an old coat. Long ago beginning with Charlie Smith women were forbidden to openly pray in the church. If they are not to pray publicly then their public covering becomes a moot point. I have heard it said by many men that they preferred their wives to have shorter hair, for many women it is easier to maintain. The argument then runs that they are being subject to their husband's will and therefore in God's order! Hold on a minute, since when were men able to change God's order? How did man usurp a woman's obligation to pray? How are we – men or women – to be heard when we have not submitted ourselves to God? How are we to rely on healing by prayer when we are dishonored by what is or is not upon our head, or our spouse's? 

I would like to see some responses to these questions, perhaps a deeper discussion is in order.

Darren

Garth Young: Lost and Found, Part Three

This is the conclusion of Garth Young’s story. If you missed the beginning, last Sunday, you can find it here. If you would like to contact Garth directly, please email him: garth@airqualitypdx.com.

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For the past eight years I have been evangelizing at the Clackamas County Jail. All the men at CCJ are criminals; many are hardened men and are hostile toward anything that doesn’t satisfy their own cravings for self-centered hedonism. My purpose in going into the jail is to declare the essential themes of God’s word, to the men – having had so much in common with them, spiritually speaking. The following is what I preach and hold dear.  

The bible declares that Jesus is the Son of God, the unblemished sacrificial lamb who gave himself as a ransom for sinners.  One of the fascinating things about the bible is that over a span of thousands of years, with many different human writers, disciples everywhere know it has only one Author. All the writings of scripture are inspired by God and without error. God reveals himself to us through his word and has given an undeniable calling to follow Jesus; his sheep will hear his voice and follow him. The message of the bible is often referred to as “the gospel” and means “good news” or “glad tidings”.

The good news is that God the father sent God the son into our broken, fallen world as a servant in order to purchase salvation for all who will believe. Here is the gospel in three points (1) Everyone is guilty of sin (Rom 3:23), (2) The penalty for sin is death (Rom 6:23), and (3) Jesus Christ died to pay the penalty for our sins (Rom 5:8). The entire bible from Genesis to Revelation is pointing to Jesus. His death actually purchased salvation for the people of God. Salvation is a free gift that cannot be earned, and everyone who believes in their heart and confesses with their mouth that God raised Jesus from the dead will be saved (Rom 10:9).

Jesus’ crucifixion seemed like a simple punishment for criminals of the day, but divine meaning of sacrifice can hardly be overstated. The cross is the place where the justice of God and the love of God come together, the very same place where justice was satisfied and love was poured out like a river.

The life, death, and resurrection of Jesus is what sets captives free, and we who were imprisoned experience that very freedom as we trust in the great achievement of Christ for ourselves. Jesus led a perfect life without sin; he was God in human form. So, for a sinner like me, here’s where the good news becomes even better: the perfection that was required of me and was impossible for me to accomplish was achieved through Christ’s perfect obedient life. The death that I should have died, Jesus experienced, taking all my sins with him and nailing them to the cross. Because Christ was raised from the dead there is complete assurance that I am not still in my sins and my faith in him is real because He lives forevermore. 

One way of explaining this is to say my deepest motivations had changed. When God put faith into my heart I came to know Jesus, who he was, and what he did was for me personally. Along with this miracle came the new desire to follow Jesus – a desire stronger than sin. The flesh is still there with its sinful desires but the new desire is the motivation for following Christ.  Now that I have been raised with Christ, I am to set my mind on things above where he is, seated at the right hand of God (Col 3:1). The goal of growth, discipleship, and maturity can truly be pursued now since he has covered me with his righteousness and I have been sealed by the Holy Spirit as a guarantee, for the praise of his glory (Eph 1:12-14).

God’s word is much more than instruction. He speaks to me through his word and has communicated to me, that I am his. I also understand through reading the bible that as a follower of Jesus, I must persevere and continue trusting him, knowing he will finish the good work he has started in me.  The evidence of faith is works. If someone says they have faith without works then their faith is dead (James 2:26). There must be a good fruit that comes from a heart of faith, because if there is no godly fruit it’s not a real faith that saves. More importantly, what is the basis of your faith? Paul says you are saved by grace through faith and not of works lest any man should boast (Eph 2:8-9). The basis of real saving faith can only be found when it is resting upon the finished work of Jesus Christ.  Some may want to say that their faith is based in how hard they worked, how strong they were, how smart they were, what church they attended,  how many good things they did, how devoted they were, all in his name, etc. but on that final day Jesus will say I never knew you (Matt 7:23).

January 6, 2002 is the last time we attended a meeting at the Oregon City Followers of Christ. Prior to our departure we heard the gospel - through the hearing and reading of God’s word. The hearing came through our radio. It was at this point that we seriously began to seek something more than the FOC. There were many convictions, but what was most disturbing was the idea that going to that church would in some way make me holy. I didn’t have a lot of understanding, but I did understand the only way I could be justified was through faith in Jesus. I was very immature when we left, but ten years later I can truly say God has been abundantly merciful. We have come so far since the day we first understood the good news, and there is no wondering if we have made the right decision. 

We had nowhere to go. We just wanted to find a church where God’s word is taught and believed. Elaine and I were baptized September 8, 2002 in Kooskia, Idaho. We had made some friends in Kooskia because that was the home church of one of the radio speakers we listened to. It wasn’t easy finding a new church as well. Our marriage was struggling but eventually the Lord sent Christian people our way who sat down with us and helped us work out the problems in our marriage.  After eighteen months of going from church to church we finally settled down and began regularly attending a church in Gladstone, OR where we have stayed and have matured significantly in the love of Christ. 

Now our hearts have come to rest in the comfort of our heavenly father. In view of the supremacy of God nothing else matters, the main purpose for which everyone is created is to bring him glory and enjoy him forever; it is only by his working in people that anyone can will or do anything that pleases him. He is the one that matters and he is the only one worthy of worship.

As I said in the beginning, this is a brief summary. It’s not possible to touch on everything that could or should be said. I have tried to put everything on the table that is crucial to understanding what has happened to Elaine and me, and how the grace of God has changed us from the inside out.

In conclusion, there is an invitation and a warning. I sincerely invite anyone to dialogue with me about any of the questions that may have come up in your mind as you read this. The only reason I have written this is because it seems a fitting platform to reach people I dearly love, the same people that may not otherwise be reached. Secondly, in view of the distorted emphasis that salvation is somehow connected to being part of the OC FOC, and the lack of bible teaching, I do not see how it is possible for the truth to be achieved while remaining at FOC, in its current state.  The FOC has insulated itself from the truth, and is leading people in a path away from the righteousness of God. I know that may seem offensive, and many will not want to hear about the responsibility they have. The truth is that God is in control and people are held responsible for their lives. The question you must ask yourself is, am I in Christ because of His mercy and grace? Or am I standing upon the merit of my good works?

Garth Young: Lost and Found, Part Two

Last Sunday, Garth Young began telling his story about being a member of the Oregon City Followers of Christ Church. Today, Garth continues his story of seeking biblical answers. Please come back Sunday to read the rest of the story.

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There were problems but problems are a part of life. From today’s perspective, I know the problems of life come from living in a fallen world. We are all born with a tendency to be self-centered which is sin and contrary to being Holy. The problem with sin is it stains. Afterward we decide to do better and move on, but the stain is still there and our record of wrong doings cannot be erased. The only thing the natural man can do is cover it up. 

I remember one time as a teenager, a friend told me he was speeding down the highway and a police car pulled him over, my friend jumped out of his truck threw open his hood and exclaimed the gas pedal was stuck and the truck would not stop, of course there was nothing wrong with his truck but he was so convincing that the officer let him go. My friend justified his actions by saying his dad told him to do whatever you can to get out of a speeding ticket. On the other hand there are some people that would never tell a lie – or at least not a big lie like that – because good people have standards to meet. Good people come to the erroneous conclusion that doing what is right will make them righteous people; these are the same people who are thankful they are not like the sinners, like the Pharisee praying at the temple (Luke 18:10-13). Being good and doing the right thing in an attempt to become righteous is just another way of covering up sin, but the stain is still there. I thought that I was better than my friend who lied to get out of a ticket, because I lived by a different standard when it came to telling the truth. The problem is I had lied in the past, and that made me a liar.

Serious questioning about the destination of my soul became very burdensome by the time I was thirty.  I read that the greatest commandment is - And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. (Mark 12:30) This was a problem because the love I was supposed to give God had been given to other things. I’ve come to realize now that loving anything more than God is not small - it is a crime against God and he will not sweep it under the rug. The biggest fear for a sinner like me was that accounts will be settled.

It’s hard to recall a more difficult time in my life than this. Discontented best describes my overall state of mind. Every time I tried to succeed in an area of my own personal righteousness, I would fail in another area, it seemed I could do nothing right. Going to church wasn’t helping me; I felt like a foreigner who didn’t speak the language, there were no answers. I was isolated in my thoughts and wanted out of the confines of this torment that seemed hidden from everyone’s perception of reality.

My dad died when I was 10 and my mother died when I was 21. Chances were, physically speaking, that I would not live much longer. Listening to people outside of our group for answers was not easy but it seemed a reasonable alternative.  If you would have asked me what I was doing at the time there is no way I could have articulated it as clearly as I can now. There was definitely a fear of the unknown because I had been told my whole life that people outside of our church were worldly, and there was for sure a fear of being alienated from everyone I had known all my life. Often I listened to Christian radio programs and sometimes would call in to ask questions. There were at least five different Christian speakers that I listened to regularly from all around the country, they all had different styles and techniques of communicating but what they all had in common is the gospel.

What happened next was nothing short of a miracle, I understood what the bible said. Before this, the truth of the gospel was foreign and unseen, everything that was important to me was only about me and was incompatible with the holiness of God; I didn't see how great He is. Everything I had stood for was wrong. I said I believed in God and no doubt he was real but it wasn't a belief that pleases the Lord, it wasn’t a belief that propelled me into worshiping God, and neither did I see Jesus as glorious and loving. There had been a complete focus on my righteousness.  This new understanding of who I was and who Jesus was broadcasted in my heart and mind that I was catastrophically stained, unable to pay my debt, and without hope. But Jesus is the great and mighty Savior, as we often praised His name in the following classic hymn: 

Not the labors of my hands

can fulfill thy law's commands;

could my zeal no respite know,

could my tears forever flow,

all for sin could not atone;

thou must save, and thou alone.

Rock of Ages by Augustus M. Toplady

The words “thou must save, and thou alone” had come out of my mouth hundreds of times in the last thirty years.

Toplady wrote such profound biblical truth that he has blessed the church for centuries – even though he himself had none of the essential qualities my group considered necessary. From 1740-1778 Augustus M. Toplady lived his brief life in England, attended Westminster School, London and Trinity College, Dublin. He preached God’s word without any recording of being called through prophecy, tongues or dreams and was never a member of the Followers of Christ Church and yet had a profoundly accurate theological understanding of God’s word. How is that possible? But perhaps the bigger question is how could I have mouthed those words so many times and not really understood what I was saying? The answer is that I was blind, I was dead, and I was an enemy of God. And there was nothing I could do to cure myself because only God can give life to the dead.

Having my dead eyes opened to see biblical truth, I was about to enter into becoming a disciple for the first time.

Garth Young: Lost and Found, Part One

It’s not easy to find former Followers who are willing to speak publicly about their experiences in the church. I am grateful, therefore, that former member, Garth Young, has agreed to tell his story on this forum. Please check back on Wednesday for part two and the final section next Sunday.

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My name is Garth Young and I grew up in the Followers of Christ Church in Oregon City. I am 41 years old, and am married to Elaine whose maiden name is Moore. We have five children, three of whom were born while we were attending the Church in Oregon City.

For those of you who are curious, this is the first time I have ever written anything about the Oregon City Followers of Christ Church - anonymous or otherwise.  This is a brief recounting in my own words of what happened to me ten years ago, when I led my family away from the church that had been our life.

Being born and raised, and starting a family within this group has meaning. It means this is my life; these are my people, my family and my friends. We had a common bond not just because of the close relational togetherness, but because we were different from those outside because of what we practiced and how devoted we were to the assignment of following Christ.

Dedication to being a member by attendance and belief in the church held out great potential for escaping the wrath of God and going to heaven. This makes complete sense because nobody wants eternal punishment and even the simplest mind can grasp the idea that good people are rewarded while bad people are punished. As a young person I was taught from the pulpit to get my good works in early and that would make me prepared. I still remember a time as a boy helping stack firewood for an older couple in our church, my friend brought up the fact that we were doing it; we were getting in our good works.

The last elder died when I was fifteen and there was no more teaching from the pulpit. The potential hope for salvation now came down to attending church twice a week and singing hymns – and of course, being a good person was still a huge part of the equation. Helping people within the group (especially when sick) was highly promoted, as was prayer and fasting, greeting with a holy kiss, and abstaining from the services of a physician. Along with these I had heard from an older and seemingly wise man that drunkenness, sexual sin and killing a human would greatly hinder my chances of finding favor with God, but most of all stay in the church.  As a result of this, a pattern began to develop within me; everyone makes mistakes, but if I can do more good than bad, it should work out in my favor, especially if I remain part of the church. This was my understanding of what God wanted his people to know and to do.

There were opinions within the FOC that considered some of the essential teachings of the church to have been radically softened over the last twenty years. The hard lines that made up the earlier church had been restructured as a remedy for our missing parts. Baptism, Lord’s Supper, preaching and leadership were areas of contention because they didn’t exist anymore. These practices disappeared due to a lack of leadership (Apostle or Elder) to implement them. At nineteen, I was well on my way to becoming an obstinate hardliner. Not only did I think salvation was achieved by going to the right church and following the prescribed actions, I also believed the bar of earning salvation needed to be raised.     

I was familiar with the bible and considered myself in agreement with the teachings of scripture. My reading however, centered on me. My understanding of the bible was always filtered through the lens of what I must do, and how I must continue in my own strength. I prayed for help, I prayed for a preacher, I prayed for understanding, but really I had the idea that faith was self mustered. There were many deficiencies in my character like pride and anger, just to name a couple.  My assessment of the continual behavior and desires that proceeded from my heart and mind fell far short from the calling Jesus gave to be perfect as the father is perfect (Mat 5:48). If perfection was the requirement for entering the kingdom, then I was disqualified at every level and so were all of my family and friends.  But if perfection was just a target to aim at in hopes of an occasional hit, all the while knowing I was safe because I’m part of the right church that does the right things, I could rest. The burden of perfection was relieved because I did what I was supposed to do. Or did I? Was it really possible that my actions could somehow erase all the condemnation that my sin had accumulated?

Little did I know, my life was about to radically change.