Sunday, April 1, 2012

Seeking A Medical Opinion

My sister-in-law Maggie Smith Shumaker has written two previous guest blogs: WhatMy Family Thinks, and Maggie’s Story, Part 2. In today’s entry, Maggie tells the story of taking her newborn son to a doctor.

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Here we were, raising our two boys, and just weeks into our second son's life, I discovered a bulge in his groin. This was common among Follower families, (at least mine). My nephew had something similar prior to his return home from my parent's house after his birth. My sister, her husband, and their new baby lived at our home for what seemed like months...it maybe wasn't that long. 



From what I remember about my son's experience, I called my mom, she told me to call my sister. My sister came over, and could find nothing wrong. The lump wasn't there. She said to keep an eye on it. Seemed like every time I had to change his diaper, it was there, and whenever I tried to show someone, it wasn't. My sister told me to call another woman in the church that had more experience with this condition. So, I made the phone call. She wasn't able to come over, since her child had chicken pox, but she told me some suggestions.



After describing what this lady told me, with my husband, he suggested taking our son to a doctor. WHAT?  Really? He wanted me to go to a doctor? Whoa...



But his explanation was spot on. He said that instead of calling a bunch of women that don't have knowledge of what this was, to take him to someone that did have knowledge. What was the difference in calling a bunch of different think so ideas than finding the real reason behind it.



We talked about where we'd go from there. If the doctor said he'd need surgery, we'd think about that option, but wouldn't do anything without praying about it first. Let's just find out first.       



I made an appointment at the Health Office in Oregon City. I was nervous, but had been there as a child with my own mother, getting some type of lotion for a rash my sister and I had. Once the appointment had been made, I asked my mom if she'd come with me to take him there, since my husband had to be at work. She turned her nose up at the idea, and said she didn't want to go with me. She did not support us taking our son to the health department, but she took my sister and I? I was confused. What was the difference of a rash we had, or a lump that my son occasionally had?



My mother-in-law and sister-in-law babysat my oldest son while I took the baby to the health department alone. I'm not sure why my mother-in-law didn't come, but it wasn't because she opposed it. My husband's family supported doing the right thing.



While at the doctor’s office, I was asked all kinds of questions about my baby. Who was his doctor, where is his shot record, did he have a PKU test? They made me strip my newborn and put him on a scale. They weren't very loving or friendly about it either. The nurses made a big deal about him having a hernia and he'd have to have surgery. They were kind of mean to me and intimidating because my newborn didn't have a pediatrician. When the friendly, male doctor arrived in the room, he put me at ease with a smile, and examined my baby. "Oh, this is a...." He explained. To this day I can't remember the name he used, but described it as fluid buildup. It was not a hernia like the nurse insisted it was. He did NOT need surgery.



The doctor said he'd seen it lots, and it typically goes away on its own in about a year's time. He said by the time my baby was walking, we would not even notice it. The doctor left, and the nurse stopped me in the hall and asked who delivered my baby. They then attempted to take a PKU test. She ripped his sock off and tried poking his heel.  I was disgruntled, and grabbed the sock back and covered his feet with his blanket as I walked out to the car.



By this time, my son was screaming. We had not gotten off on a very good nursing habit and he was hungry and upset at all of this commotion. I was practically in tears. I tried nursing him in the car, but he would have no part of it. I put him back in his car seat, screaming all the way home. What a nightmare.



But, thankfully, we could rest in the fact that it was not life threatening, he wouldn't sustain any harm from whatever this was, and eventually, it would go away. This could be a long first year...



In our experiences, with sickness and injuries, we anointed with olive oil. So, after sharing with my husband the prognosis of our son's affliction, he told me to anoint him every day and we'll pray that he's healed. So, we did just that. When my husband cared for him, he'd anoint him, when I cared for him, I would anoint him. It didn't seem to bother our baby, but we kept on even when we didn't see the big bulge. Faithfully, every day, we anointed him, praying for healing in Jesus’ name.



It seemed like the right thing to do...pray for someone that was afflicted, injured, or sick. We all met over at my mother's bedside praying for her, as she lay in bed afflicted with the swollen belly. She had been down for what seemed to be a couple of weeks, and our baby was probably a month old or better. While my sisters and I were in her room, visiting, I explained to them we'd like them to pray for our baby. I told them what was the matter, but leaving out the part that I'd "taken him in". My oldest sister rose up out of her chair, and loudly voiced her opinion of no, she would not pray for him, as we'd taken him to a doctor. Her words to my knowledge were, "Oh, you take him to a doctor and THEN want us to PRAY for him?" as she stormed out of my mother's bedroom.



Wow! I sat in awe. I was speechless! How can one say they are a follower of Christ and deny prayer to another humbly asking? My mom just laid there, shocked at her daughter's response.  I can't even remember what happened after that.



I believe our son was about three months old, when we noticed the last few times we had anointed him, we didn't see any bulge.  I'm not sure if it got smaller over time, or what, but he was not nearly one year old when this fluid buildup was gone. Our prayers had been answered, he had been healed. We thanked God for his mercy with our son.



Imagine, God having mercy on someone who went to a doctor. God is good, and we believed that.

23 comments:

  1. OH MY GOSH I cried when I was reading this. I am not sure what to say except PRAYERS AND DOCTORS ARE BOTH NEEDED

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  2. prayers always, doctors when needed.

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  3. Many followers have done a 180 when it comes to doctors. Unfortunately many believe that you are breaking gods law and will go to hell if you go to a doctor. It amazes me that doctors are evil in their minds but lawyers are just fine. Maggie's story about her son is a sad. I think it speaks almost as poorly about her husband as it does her sister. He left his wife to handle her family and was to busy working to go to the doctor with his baby. If he was so concerned why not make time to see the doctor yourself not make your wife go alone to a scary unfamiliar place.

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    1. Oh for gods sake, anon, April 1st, 2012 at 11:06 PM.

      First, it was a hospital. People need to get over it. It's there to save your life, or at least to heal you. That's it's entire purpose.

      Second, the condition her son had was obviously, even before diagnosis, not immediately life-threatening. The father didn't HAVE to be there.

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  4. I am so sorry she had such thoughtless public employees treat her so rudely. Doctors and their staffs are so nice ( it is a competitive field )now, that it is almost a pleasure to see them.

    Too bad the one FOC couple were choosing blindness in their baby, rather than having a simple blood tumor removed shortly after birth of the pretty little baby girl. Is it a badge of faith to have her horrendously disfigured for life?

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  5. "My oldest sister rose up out of her chair, and loudly voiced her opinion of no, she would not pray for him, as we'd taken him to a doctor. Her words to my knowledge were, "Oh, you take him to a doctor and THEN want us to PRAY for him?" as she stormed out of my mother's bedroom."

    Unfortunately reactions like this are not uncommon at the FOC. What happened to Maggie has happened to many other people. If you believe in salvation by grace it is difficult to be so condemning of other people, regardless of what sin you believe they have committed.

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  6. Anon on 4-1 at 11:06pm...please do not disrespect my husband. I can not remember the reason, but it was something that was not able to be done at the time. He wanted to go. I'm glad he encouraged me to seek care. I have heard of people taking their kids in, and others seeking surgery. They should, since God's word says to obey the law. I know by sharing my experiences a life may be saved.

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    1. I have never been impressed by your husband or his good friend DN. You don't have a problem disrespecting people you don't like you shouldn't be shocked that not everyone respects or likes your husband. He has never been afraid to say what he thinks, he has always been very blunt and rude.

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  7. To Anon on 4/4 @ 7:13 pm.
    I'm unaware of disrespecting people I don't like. Who don't I like? Who am I disrespecting?
    I'm actually not shocked at your posts. I'm aware that my husband is not liked by several people.
    You are correct by saying he hasn't been afraid to say what he (you use thinks) its more accurate to use believes...he believes in the Truth of the Word of God.
    Unfortunately, we're even told in His word that we "will be hated by all for His name's sake."....in Matthew 10:22. I honestly don't believe you hate my husband.
    I feel, (even though I have no idea who you are) that you're afraid, confused and embarrassed that my husband spoke truth, or maybe a little envious that we're not being controlled by man anymore, but the Holy Spirit. Who's control are you under? My prayer for you is that God softens your heart to His truth, and that you can accept His gift.

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    1. Hate is a strong word. I said I don't respect him and that he is rude. I am curious what he thinks of his old friend, are they still friends?

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    2. It was very typical for people to call others names or say they are rude, when the FOC was spoken against by insiders. I suspect you thought he was rude simply because you did not agree with him.

      I agree with Maggie in that..."My prayer for you is that God softens your heart to His truth, and that you can accept His gift."

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    3. No, my brother is not still friends with him and has not spoken to him in years (since before that whole thing went down). If you'd like to ask Maggie questions about who members of her family are friends with, please email her directly.

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    4. I also agree Anon @ 12:23pm...Hate is a strong word. I was using God's word, not yours. I do know you don't respect him and you think he's rude, however my point was Gos tells me, and my husband we will be hated...disrespected, evil thought of...(which I'm sure all could be thought of as hateful actions/thoughts)

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    5. I meant God's word not Gos. Please excuse my tough screen one finger typing.

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  8. Who are you disrespecting?Are you so self righteous that you dont believe you have been very dis respective of the followers of christ church that you once say you were a member of,and to your mother dad and sisters memory.Airing your dirty laundry does not put you in a good light.

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    1. In response to ^^^ on 4/7 @ 6:39pm :
      I felt disrespected when I first read Suzanne's blog. I thought, "How dare she write these things!" Until I read further, realizing her heart, and that this is part of her testimony in coming to Christ. You may not know about that, but me as a believer, made new in His sight, has a testimony of God's goodness and mercies, etc. Part of the reason I'm sharing on her blog is that she asked me to when she first started it. I said no, and wanted no part of it...until encouragement came from my bible study group confirming my prayers about sharing our story. Whether or not you feel I'm airing my dirty laundry, isn't going to stop me from sharing the changes God made in me. my parents, as they rest in peace, are not being disrespected by me. They are no longer of this life. I honored them and respected them while they had life on earth. As for my sisters, like I told another anonymous poster, I am not told to honor my sisters. I love them, and their children and grandchildren, but they haven't spoke to me since 2004 as an accidental bump into at Fred Meyers...and if it weren't for that, I'd not seen nor heard of them since August of 1999.

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  9. JUDAS ISCARIOT THOUGHT HE WAS RIGHT ALSO

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    1. Actually judas did not think he was right. Luke 22:3 says satin entered him. So was he made for this betrail or just tempted by satin.

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  10. your husband told your father to "get the Hell out of my house" is that how you show respect?

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  11. You weren't there, you don't know what was said, you're unaware of all the disrespecting that went on. You're welcome to email me directly @ shumag6@gmail.com

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  12. I cannot understand why people still respect and defend followers who denounce people for seeking medical attention. I have witnessed members being asked to no longer attend church and members refusing to pray for them. They lost the faith. I have had relatives that were ill and I have connection through my business with ministers of several faiths, all have held prayer meetings and asked what they could do to help even though the relative was a follower.I have never had this experience with the followers as theirs is the only true way. How compasionate and Godly is it to shun your own members? Even Jesus forgave people who had fallen from faith.

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    1. Well, if you believe in the word of God, you will defend them if it's your parent. But, I do not have a defense there anymore.

      No one would convince us to stay. Why shun when you're the "one". I believe it's because they know it's wrong, and they can't defend themselves. What else would it be?

      It's mind boggling to me for the ones that stay to keep telling themselves it's the only way when they can't prove it to the ones that leave.

      On the flip side, no one will listen or be inclined to turn an ear to those that DO receive Christ, they just show up to their homes and claim to no longer know them.

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    2. I was one that was shunned by my family because I never joined the faith. My sibling just disowned their own children and destroyed their pictures as they never existed.I don't think God will make kids respect parents that are so abusive to their own. I hope for the future of children born into these families that there is never another preacher or elder called so the church will destruct and just go away. You will never understand the abuse and senseless deaths I have witnessed in my lifetime in the name of that that church. I am so sorry for the believers as they are truly lost.I belive in a kind God not one that is cruel.

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